


So This is Hell

by Katness2019



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: (and fails), Ace Alastor, Alastor Likes Bread (Hazbin Hotel), Alastor won't let him, Alcohol, Angel Dust Being Angel Dust (Hazbin Hotel), Angel Hates Them, Angel wants to call him Daddy, Bisexual Charlie Magne, Charlie Magne Tries, Charlie Magne is an Absolute Ray of Sunshine, Charlie Magne is too Pure, Chatting & Messaging, F/F, Featuring Alastor's Dad Jokes, Gay Angel Dust, Gen, Husk Literally only want Alcohol, Husk is So Done (Hazbin Hotel), Is Angel Dust's Floof a Weave?? Mayhaps..., Lesbian Vaggie, Niffty is Jealous, Niffty is ooc, Pansexual Husk, Parental Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), Straight Niffty, Swearing, Texting, Vaggie is Just High-Key Thirsty for Charlie, Vaggie is So Done (Hazbin Hotel), We Respect Alastor's Asexualness, Weird Husk/Niffty Friendship, chat fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-11
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:28:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23432419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katness2019/pseuds/Katness2019
Summary: Hazbin characters but in a group chat I guess???
Relationships: Charlie Magne/Vaggie
Comments: 30
Kudos: 164





	1. It Has Begunnnnn

**Author's Note:**

> I already know this is gonna flop but I already wrote it so ¯\\_(ツ)_/

_ Charlie Magne has added Angel Dust, The Radio Demon, Vagatha, Husk, and Nifty to an unnamed chat _

_ Charlie Magne has named the chat “The Happy Hotel” _

**Charlie Magne:** Hi!

**Vagatha:** Hi, hun, um what would this be?

**Angel Dust:** I’m on the same page as Vagatha

**Vagatha:** Knock it off Anthony

**Angel Dust:** No need to get your taco in a twist.

**Vagatha:** unoriginal.

**Charlie Magne:** Please no fighting!!

**The Radio Demon:** I agree, it’s quite boring actually.

**Husk:** Why the fuck am I here?

**Charlie Magne:** Because you’re a valued member of our hotel!

**Nifty:** He’s also the only boy besides Alastor!!

**Angel Dust:** Too many exclamation marks it’s giving me a migraine

**The Radio Demon:** Ah my feminine friend, I notice you’ve lost all of your teachings of punctuation!

**Angel Dust:** It’s texting you strawberry pimp

**The Radio Demon:** I find our chats delightful young sir!

**Nifty:** Really?

**Husk:** He wasn’t serious

**The Radio Demon:** Or was I? The world is craved of such knowledge!

**Angel Dust:** You confuse me old man

**Charlie Magne:** Anywho, this chat is emergencies or for any help, you may need

**Nifty:** Neato!

**Husk:** This sucks

**Angel Dust:** Then you must swallow. It elementary

**Vagatha:** That sounds like a place you’ve never been

**The Radio Demon:** Pardon my asking, my delightful pal, what does it mean to swallow.

**Charlie Magne:** Oh I can explain!!

**Angel Dust:** Can she..?

**Vagatha:** I hope fucking not.

**Charlie Magne:** You have to suck on a straw and then you get whatever was in the cup so you swallow. So drinking with a straw

  
**The Radio Demon:** Thank you very kindly, my dear!

**Husk:** No that’s not what that means

**Vagatha:** Do not explain. I will choke you if you do.

**Angel Dust:** Sounds kinky ;)

**The Radio Demon:** No

**Charlie Magne:** Aw I liked the winky face at the end

**The Radio Demon:** Let’s move onto the next topic I say

**Nifty:** Oh! Oh! We should all have nicknames!!

_ Charlie Magne has changed Vagatha’s name to Best Girl _

_  
_ _ Charlie Magne has changed Angel Dust’s name to Misunderstood Spider _

**Misunderstood Spider:** What am I? A Disney villain?

_ Misunderstood Spider has changed their own name to Horny Spider _

**Horny Spider:** Better!

**Best Girl:** my name is not true but I love it and shall cherish it

_ Horny Spider changed Best Girl’s name to That One Moth Meme _

**That One Moth Meme:** Thanks I hate it

**Horny Spider:** You’re welcome toots

_ Nifty has changed Husk’s name to Balto  _

**Balto:** You all suck

**Horny Spider:** ...You swallow

**The Radio Demon:** Not to judge your crude, sexual comments, although we all could do without, why must you?

**Horny Spider:** Oh I just say it to say it

**The Radio Demon:** Ah, thank you for the response kind fellow!

**Nifty:** He means you did not help at all.

**Balto:** Hold up. Balto is a fucking dog.

**Horny Spider:** He is a wolf, how dARE YOU!

**Nifty:** You’re like Balto if Balto was a grumpy dead cat

_ Charlie Magne has changed The Radio Demon’s name to Father _

**That One Moth Meme:** Better than Lucifer tho

**Charlie Magne:** I will not agree with you..but I also will not disagree

**Father:** I’m quite flattered! My friends if you desire to call me this I will not argue

**Horny Spider:** Can I call you Daddy?

**Father:** Of course!

**Balto:** No, The answer is no

**Horny Spider:** Jealous?

**Father:** I see no reason not to be called Daddy? I’m proud to say I’ve taken place as a father figure for these young minds!

**Balto:** It’s sexual

**Father:** No, you may not call me Daddy. You may call me Alastor

**That One Moth Meme:** Angel you fucking ruined it

**That One Moth Meme:** Now we are fatherless yet again

**Nifty:** Doesn’t Charlie have a dad? The handsome one

**Charlie Magne:** I do, he’s just usually not around

**Horny Spider:** Fathers live to disappoint

**That One Moth Meme:** That sounds so depressing?

**Nifty:** Does everyone here have daddy issues?? Is everyone’s dad hot like Charlie’s?

**Charlie Magne:** Next topic

_ Charlie Magne has changed Horny Spider’s name to floof _

**Floof:** nuuuu

**Father:** It’s perfect! However my dear, you still haven’t a name!

_ Floof has changed Charlie Magne’s name to Alastor’s Favorite _

**Father:** I don’t have a favorite of you all, except I do and it is Charlie

**That One Moth Meme:** Charlie’s my favorite too so no hate man

**Nifty:** So everyone likes Charlie more

**Balto:** No I hate everyone here

**Floof:** Awww, you secretly love us. Perhaps me more

**Balto:** No

**Floof:** Really? So it’s just strictly lusting?

**Balto:** Charlotte I have a complaint

**Alastor’s Favorite:** Call me Charlie, please. What would be the complaint

**Balto:** I have arachnapobia 

**Floof:** Hey, I’m afraid of alcoholics 

**Nifty:** So of yourself

**Floof:** I drink a bit, but I’m not constantly drunk

**Alastor’s Favorite:** But you should try to refrain from drinking!

**Floof:** Sure

**Father:** Ah this is going swell

**Balto:** He’s eating popcorn right now

**Father:** Well you know what they say!

**That One Moth Meme:** Snitches get stitches and wind up in ditches

**Floof:** Snitches are big ugly bitches

**Father:** I was going for the young lady’s answer

_ Alastor’s Favorite changed their name to Charlie _

_ That One Moth Meme changed Charlie’s name to Charming Demon Belle _

**That One Moth Meme:** Copyright Alastor

**Father:** Why thank you

**Charming Demon Belle:** hey Alastor...did you see that?

**Father:** What do you speak of?

**Charming Demon Belle:** Vaggie’s being nice :D

**Charming Demon Belle:** A sure sign of redemption!

**Floof:** She’s mean to everyone but you

**That One Moth Meme:** ill kill u

**Floof:** See? Disgrace!!

**Balto:** Talking about yourself are you?

**That One Moth Meme:** D a m n

**Charming Demon Belle:** Angelica, thank god. Someone who understands what struggling here to do

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m not here for youuuuu

**Nifty:** What’s she doing? Is she okay? I bet she’s not.

**Charming Demon Belle:** ...Alastor?

**Father:** I haven’t a clue on what just took place my dear

**Charming Demon Belle:** ...Angel?

**Floof:** Sorry??

**Charming Demon Belle:** It was from a musical :(

**Balto:** Hamilton…

**Charming Demon Belle:** You listen to musicals!! :D

**Floof:** Wait really?? This is priceless. YOU like musicals??

**Balto:** Yes I do, and if anyone thinks that makes me less of a man they can talk to my fucking gun

**Floof:** W h at

**Charming Demon Belle:** it’s a different musical

**Father:** :o

**Floof:** Who taught him to do that?

**Father:** :0

**Floof:** Knock it the fuck off

**Father:** :O

**Floof:** Goddamn this truly is hell


	2. Two Shots of Vodka

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> UhhhHHh??? Charlie gets everybody frappucinos cause she's too pure and then everyone rUInS it by trying to corrupt Charlie??

_ 6:34 _

**Charming Demon Belle:** Are you all still asleep??

_ 6:37 _

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m going to leave then, I’ll be back!!

_ 7:00 _

**That One Moth Meme:** Where the fuck is Charlie!?

**That One Moth Meme:** Nevermind

**Floof:** Goddamn I just woke up and you are already ready to throw hands

**Floof:** You interrupted my beauty sleep

**That One Moth Meme:** You need a lot of that

**Floof:** How rude. Your girlfriend’s missing

**That One Moth Meme:** Do you know where she is???

**Floof:** How the tables have turned

**That One Moth Meme:** You lil bitch

**That One Moth Meme:** where?

**Floof:** Idk

**Father:** Good morning!

**Father:** how I hate to be awoken by my phone going off every two seconds

**Father:** And then finding the messages were from you two and your crude obscenities 

**Floof:** Not my fault. Vag is upset

**Father:** Oh dear, what is the cause?

**Floof:** Charlie isn’t here

**Father:** She said she’d be back

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m back!

**Charming Demon Belle:** Do any of you have allergies?

**Floof:** I can’t have peppermint...why?

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’ve brought frappucinos 

**Nifty:** Can I have one?? Are they good? Where from??

**Charming Demon Belle:** Of course, I got them for everyone! They are good. They’re from Starbucks

**Nifty:** ..OOh!! Sounds neato!

**Father:** Hell has starbucks?

**Charming Demon Belle:** I asked Millie from IMP to get them, I got her one too.

**Charming Demon Belle:** They’re mostly french vanilla, but I got choc. Machhiato for Vaggie

**That One Moth Meme:** Aw, thank you

**Father:** Such a kind thing to do. Why?

**Charming Demon Belle:** To be nice

**Floof:** Charlie’s just a softy, too nice for her own good

**That One Moth Meme:** Angel saying something nice and not sarcastic??

**Floof:** Hey

**Floof:** Fuck you

**Charming Demon Belle:** !!

**Floof:** Ahem

**Floof:** Fork you

**Charming Demon Belle:** :D

**Floof:** >:(

**Charming Demon Belle:** :o

**Floof:** (¬､¬)

**Charming Demon Belle:** ⊂(・▽・⊂)

**Floof:** (っ⇀⑃↼)っ

**Charming Demon Belle:** (＾ω＾)

**Floof:** ψ(｀∇´)ψ

**Floof:** ( ﾒ▼Д▼)┏☆====))

**Charming Demon Belle:** (ﾟдﾟ；)

**Charming Demon Belle:** ･ﾟﾟ･(×_×)･ﾟﾟ･

**That One Moth Meme:** w h at

**Nifty:** They hugged and then the girl shot Charlie

**Floof:** I am a boy

**Nifty:** What? Since when? Why didn’t you tell me? I’m sorry? Are you angry?

**Floof:** YEs actually I am furious

**Father:** Don’t fret darling! I’m quite positive he’s teasing!

**Balto:** What the fuck. It’s too early for this crap

**Charming Demon Belle:** Sorry!!

**That One Moth Meme:** It’s like 7:40???

**Father:** It’s quite early for our fellow Husk

**Balto:** Fuck you

**Father:** No thank you

**  
** **Floof:** If he doesn’t I will!

**Balto:** Never.

**Nifty:** Charlie brough coffee!

**Balto:** With what?

**Nifty:** What do you mean??

**Balto:** Nevermind I’ll add my own

**Father;** Alcohol, the better water

**That One Moth Meme:** Eh, no

**That One Moth Meme:** You guys aren’t supposed to be drinking anyways

**Floof:** Shhhhh, shhhhh

**That One Moth Meme:** ugh

**Floof:** Finally

**Charming Demon Belle:** What does alcohol taste like

**Floof:** You’ve never had alcohol?? How are we living in the same residence

**That One Moth Meme:** I remember when I first tried it, I was thirteen

**Floof:** Ha, I was nine!

**Nifty:** Oh! Oh! I was 24!!

**Balto:** Better late than never

**Charming Demon Belle:** I kind of want to taste it..

**That One Moth Meme:** No!! You’re trying to rehabilitate others!

  
**Floof:** Jesus can literally make fucking alcohol with his fingers, she’ll be fine

**Nifty:** Oh!! Oh!! I’ve read the bible!

**Balto:** Boring. I don’t believe in god

**Floof:** We right now are in hell.

**Balto:** So?

**Nifty:** It says one glass is fine maybe

**Charming Demon Belle:** Ehh, I don’t think I will

**That One Moth Meme:** Yes!

**Floof:** Nooo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've never read the bible before so I'm not actually sure what it says but Jesus literally makes alcohol by touching it so I might be fine. I just google what the rules about drinking were so it's probably wrong  
> If you feel like it, please leave a review (it absolutely makes my day)


	3. Oops snatched ur weave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oi...Alastor likes bread and Angel Dust has a deep dark secret??

**Father:** Does anyone know where the bread has gone??

**Niffty:** Oh! I haven’t seen it! Why? Is it gone? Did lady spider take it? Can spiders eat bread?

**Floof:** I did not take ur fucking bread but thanks for the accusation.

**That One Moth Meme:** I ate a sandwich but there was like fours pieces left

**Floof:** So two pieces

**That One Moth Meme:** No four? Are you illiterate?

**Floof:** Nobody eats th first and last piece bug brain

**That One Moth Meme:** You’re one to talk

**Floof:** I’m an arachnid you absolute heathen

**Balto:** shut up

**Floof:** Make me ;3

**Balto:** I won’t hesitate biTch

**Floof:** O-O

**That One Moth Meme:** Disgusting.

**Floof:** rood

**Father:** _where is the bread you impudent rats_

**Charming Demon Belle:** Sorry, I made toast earlier!! I can go out and get some more?

**Father:** No thank you. I shall just summon it

**Floof:** W H A t

**That One Moth Meme:** You could’ve just summoned it all along?

**Father:** I wanted you to confess 

**Balto:** Waste of fucking time

**Floof:** Fucking time? Count me in

**Balto;** Back off you horny bitch

**That One Moth Meme:** You called?

**Floof:** Just straight up snatched my weave

**Niffty:** i knew it was fake.

**Floof:** wait no

**That One Moth Meme:** can’t believe you’ve been lying to us the entire time Angel

**Father;** You had me fooled...Alas(tor) no longer shall you deceive me

**Floof:** I hate you all. I’m calling Cherri Bomb

_ Floof has left the groupchat _

**That One Moth Meme:** finally

_ Father’s Favorite has added Floof to the groupchat _

**Floof:** Fuck you!

**Charming Demon Belle:** No thank you

**Floof:** Blease you’d be lucky

**That One Moth Meme:** I’d**

**Charming Demon Belle:** Actually could we change topic for a sec?

**Niffty:** What is it? Is it about me? What do you know? DId Husk tell you?

**Niffty:** You gotta gve me my money back Husk!!!

**Balto:** I didn’t do nothing

**Charming Demon Belle:** Why is it called Hazbin now?

_ Father has left the group chat _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I meant to upload earlier but ehhhhh


	4. Angel Set a Fire (And he burned down the house) WhOaoOaoAOa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I mean can you guess from the title??  
> (the hotel doesn't actually get burned down tho)

_ 8:13 _

**Floof:** So, there maaaaaaaay be a problem

**That One Moth Meme:** Is it you?

**Floof:** Wow, you’ve hurt my feelings. I’m crying.

**That One Moth Meme:** Ha! Got em!

**Balto:** Can you both shut the fuck up?

**Floof:** No. The kitchen is on fire

**Nifty:** p a r d o n

**Floof:** I said that we had a problem!

**That One Moth Meme:** I will kill you.

**Floof:** have fun with killing a dead person ;3

**That One Moth Meme:** Trust me, I will.

**Niffty:** There’s bleach under the sink!!

**Balto:** Sounds delicious.

**Floof:** w h at

**That One Moth Meme:** Are we doing bleach shots? I’m in!

**Niffty:** That’s my bleach you fucking hoes back off before I bite your fat cankles until the bleed out fucking pussy juice

**Balto:** whAT

**Floof:** Niffty is my new bff

**That One Moth Meme:** so, no bleach shots i guess..

**Floof;** Who knew Niffty could be so fun!!

**Balto:** She’s only like that when it comes to her cleaning products

**That One Moth Meme:** strange..

**Father:** Ah! What a fine morning this is! How are all, you misfits?

**Balto:** Awful

**Father:** I’m sorry to hear the my feline fellow!

**Father:** …

**Father:** the kitchen is on fire?

**That One Moth Meme:** omg I fucking forgot

**Father:** This is the quality content I deserve! And even so early in the morning! How positively delightful!

**Floof:** Update: I am stuck on the pot rack and Niffty has ran straight near the sink and is trying to get her cleaning things

**That One Moth Meme:** well at least the fire is on the other side of the kitchen

**Floof:** Uhhhh

**Balto:** The stove is on the OTHER FUCKING SIDE

**Balto:** How the fuck are you this dumb?

**That One Moth Meme:** how did you even-

**That One Moth Meme:** Did your parents drop you or something?

**Floof:** Bold of you to assume I was held

**Father:** I-

**Charming Demon Belle:** Goodmorning everyone! How did you wake up before me?? That’s strange haha

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m going to read the messages for a second, hold up,

**Floof:** oh no

**That One Moth Meme:** ^^

**Charming Demon Belle;** You’re all  **SO** grounded.

**Niffty:** Hiya!! I’ve got my cleaning products!! I left the lady looking boy in the kitchen

**Floof:** yeah thanks

**Niffty:** :)

**Floof:** Oop, Charlie just grabbed the fire extinguisher 

**Balto:** Finally.

**That One Moth Meme:** I didn’t see you helping

**Father:** Nor you though ma’am

**That One Moth Meme:** “ma’am” Jeez get your rickety behind outta here

**Father:** I could kill you right now

**That One Moth Meme:** You don’t have the balls

**Floof:** I bet he does, and I’d love to see them

**Father:** I just vomited a tad

**Father;** I would rather ballroom dance with Husker while wearing a gown and listening to Justin Beaber

**Balto:** Why the fuck did you bring me into this?

**Charming Demon Belle:** SILENCE!

**Charming Demon Belle:** You are  **ALL** in trouble!

**Balto:** Aye, we aren’t the one who started a fire

**Charming Demon Belle:** You certainly didn’t help.

_ Charming Demon Belle has logged off _

**Floof:** damn.

_ Charming Demon Belle has logged back on _

**Charming Demon Belle:** Vaggie, I expected more from you.

_ Charming Demon Belle has logged off _

**Niffty:** damn indeed.

**Floof:** Someone ain’t getting coochie tonight~

**That One Moth Meme:** You’re such an ass!

**Floof:** (aka something you won’t be seeing anytime soon)

**Father:** You are all disgusting.

**Father:** But I do have one more thing to add involving this predicament

**Father:** the hotel is now a HOTel

**Balto:** You’re fucking dead to me

**Father:** I’m dead to everybody

_ Balto has left the group chat _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiii!! I hope you're having a fantabulous evening!!  
> I'm so happy about all the recent support I've gotten on this work because it means so much to me! I honestly thought the post wasn't even going to get any hits, but you're all so nice and friendly! Thank you so much!!


	5. You're My Dad (Boogie woogie woogie!!)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uhhhM Everyone has daddy issues and Angel Dust wants everyone to fight him apparently.

**Floof:** That moment where ur dad calls and you wanna be double dead :’)

**Balto:** That moment where ur dad goes to the store to get milk :’) 

**Charming Demon Belle:** That moment where ur dad doesn’t love you :’)

**That One Moth Meme:** That moment where ur dad is an asshole :’)

**Niffty:** w a t

**Floof:** Nah, it’s okay I can always find another daddy ;)

**Balto:** you fucking ruined it

**Father:** Oh my

**Father:** I’ll be everyone’s father

**Floof:** Okay then Daddy

**That One Moth Meme:** Thank you daddy

**Balto:** Daddy, why don’t you buy me beer?

**Charming Demon Belle:** I don’t want to call you daddy

**Father:** yeah don’t

**Father:** I’m abandoning all my children except Charlie and Niffty

**Niffty:** I already have a dad? Does this mean I have two dads? My moms not gonna be happy!!

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m so confused now

**Floof:** good

**Floof:** Hey are you and Mothra talking?

**Charming Demon Belle;** Oh yes, we never fight for too long :)

**That One Moth Meme:** No, wait...Did that lil fucker call me Mothra?

**Floof:** Mayhaps I did Mothra

**That One Moth Meme:** I see. So you’ve chosen death

**Floof;** It sounds delightful

**Balto:** Ur already fucking dead

**Floof:** Shhhh

_ Floof has changed That One Moth Meme’s name to Mothra _

_ Floof has changed Balto’s name to ...tequila! _

**...tequila!:** I hate you

**Mothra:** dw, I’m already plotting revenge

**Charming Demon Belle:** oh no

**Floof:** :o

**Mothra:** >:)

**Floof:** o h nO

**Charming Demon Belle has changed ...tequila!’s name to Azrael**

**Azrael;** the fuck

**Charming Demon Belle:** The cat from smurfs!!

**Azrael:** I ain’t no fat cheeto motherfucking slave

**Azrael:** That bitch looks like a fucking carrot

_ Azrael has changed their name to ...tequila! _

_...tequila has change mothra’s name to Plankton _

**Plankton:** I-

**Floof:** All hail the mighty tequila!!!

**Plankton:** Great now I gotta kill both of you

**Charming Demon Belle:** No sinning!!

**Charming Demon Belle:** Remember our goal is to rehabilitate sinners!

**Plankton:** yeah..

**Charming Demone Belle:** Good! Remember our saying??

**Charming Demone Belle:** Inside of every demon is…

**Father:** a lost cause

**Charming Demon Belle:** no...no...a rainbow

**Floof:** every demon is a lil gay

**Niffty** : ...really?

**Plankton:** No

**...tequila!:** maybe

**Niffty:** wh at

**Father:** I would never date a boy

**Floof:** I am a female

**Niffty:** ....I KNEW iT!! I CaLLed it!!

**Father:** I would also never date a female

**Father:** Nor a person 

**Floof:** fucK

**Charming Demon Belle:** to clarify what is everyone’s sexuality?

**Niffty:** BOyS!

**Floof:** ^^

**Plankton:** wamen

**Father:** Everyone is disgusting

**Charming Demon Belle:** Everyone is beautiful

**Charming Demon Belle:** (bi to clarify)

**...tequila!:** I really like pans

**...tequila!:** They’re just so sexy

**Floof:** This is so weird

**Plankton:** Ikr go back to be grumpy and alcohol

**Father:** This happens like twice a year

**Niffty:** Him joking is VERY rare! You should appreciate you caught sight of it!

**...tequila!:** Who said I was kidding?

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m still just too shocked 

**...tequila:** Fuck you

**...tequila!:** I’ve got a great sense of humor I just don’t want to waste it on you asshats

**Floof:** Finally back to normal

**Niffty:** :’(

**Plankton:** Why are you sad? Peace has been restored!

**Father:** We’re in hell, doomed for eternity, my dear, there is no peace

**Floof:** ...how exciting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has daddy issues bc I've daddy issues and I really hate calling them daddy issues.  
> Thank you all for leaving such kind reviews!


	6. I Won't Hesitate BITCH (Niffty's Revenge)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh, Niffty is angry because she doesn't have a name so she snatches all the food

**Plankton:** We’re out of food again

**Plankton:** ugh

_Plankton has changed their name to Charlie’s Bitch_

**Charlie’s Bitch:** perfect

**Charming Demon Belle:** w at

**Charlie’s Bitch:** ;)

**Charming Demon Belle:** :o

**Floof:** ew horny lesbinins

**Charlie’s Bitch:** fuck

**Charlie’s Bitch:** …

_Charlie’s Bitch has changed their name to lesbinin_

**Floof:** Omgs I feel so flattered???

**Lesbinin;** You should.

**...tequila!:** I’m hungry

**Floof:** You could always eat my ass

**...tequila:** oop guess I’ll starve

**Charming Demon Belle:** Hold up I bought groceries three days ago

**Niffty:** I hid them.

**...tequila!:** where.

**Niffty:** I have a proposition. 

**Father:** What’d that be, doll?

**Niffty:** I want a name.

 **Floof:** you’re niffty. Oh! There it is! Where’s the food?

**Lesbinin:** I think she means on the gc, quarter-wit

**Father:** I believe it’s half-wit

**Lesbinin:** not in his case

**Floof:** :o

**Charming Demon Belle:** Could we please just focus on getting the food?

**...tequila!:** Just give her a fucking name 

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m not creative!

**Lesbinin:** that was a lie but whatever

**Floof;** Who cleans?

**....tequila!:** uh...Maid Marian?

**Lesbinin:** The the hell is Maid Marian?   
  


**Charming Demon Belle:** _!!!_ Maid Marian is Robin Hood’s girlfriend _!!!_

**Father:** And she is not a Maid, it is referring to the word Maiden

**Floof:** Sorry _Roman_

**Father:** Whom?

**Floof:** Worst character ever

**Lesbinin:** My bad, I was under the impression that was you

**Floof:** shut uppp

**Father:** Who’s the best character?

**...tequila!:** me.

**Floof:** Remus

 **Charming Demon Belle:**...The werewolf?

**Niffty:** N A M E!

**Floof:** oop

**...tequila:** poodles

**Niffty:** _no_

**Charming Demon Belle:** Niffty, why must you be doing this?

**Niffty:** I’m the only one without a name! I like to be included too!

_Floof has changed Niffty’s name to Bitch Detergent_

**Lesbinin:** That’s…

**Lesbinin:** actually not too bad

**Bitch Detergent:** I love it

**Bitch Detergent:** Buuuuuut

**Father:** Oh golly gee willikers 

**Bitch Detergent:** I gave the food to a homeless man…

**Charming Demon Belle:** …

**Charming Demon:** I’m so proud!!!!!!!

**Floof:** I’m so hungry…

**Father:** Why hello, so hungry. I’m Father.

  
 **Floof:** o h n o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a certain reference in here, props to you if you caught it!


	7. Hi, I'm Angel Dust and I'll be your Freestyle Dance Teacher

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angel dances, Everyone says boo.

**Lesbinin:** Niffty I need ur bleach

**Bitch Detergent:** for what??

**Lesbinin:** my eYEs

**Bambi Wannabe** : Ah, what has you so upset my dear?

**Lesbinin:** I just walked in on Angel doing the renegade

**Bambi Wannabe:** Oh my!

**Bitch Detergent:** What’s the renegade!?!?

**...tequila!:** Oh dear lord! No one show her!

**Bitch Detergent:** OwO?

**...tequila!:** Gross you fucking furry

**Charming Demon Belle:** I-

**Floof:** you are a cat.

**...tequila!:** ew its you

**Floof:** My dancing is not that bad!!

**Lesbinin:** The thing is you look like you’d be a hell of a dancer

**Bambi Wannabe:** turns out he’s more of a Vixen

**Bitch Detergent:** What does that mean?? I’m so confused?

**Charming Demon Belle:** I think it’s because of Rudolph

**Floof;** That explains it.

**Bambi Wannabe:** You know Dasher and DANCER, Prancer, and VIXEN

**...tequila:** It’s not a good joke if no one understands it

**Bitch Detergent:** And we called him Father :(

**Bambi Wannabe:** Angel Dust cannot dance

**Lesbinin:** He’s AWFUL

**Floof;** If when you say that you mean the crowd is full of “Aws” then yes

**Lesbinin:** Husk can attest, he was there

**...tequila!:** ...that was dancing? I thought he was having a fucking seizure!

**Charming Demon Belle:** and you just stood there?

**...tequila!:** I was busy

**Lesbinin:** He was making a daiquiri

**...tequila:** nark

**Lesbinin:** >:P

**Floof:** Moral of the story: I’m amazing at everything

**Bitch Detergent:** Apart from dancing!

**Floof:** nO

**Lesbinin:** I’d rather murder Charlie than see that

**Charming Demon Belle:** _ w h a t _

**Bambi Wannabe:** My god! Now I need to see this DEMONstration! 

**Floof:** Everyone! Come to the lobby if you wish to watch me do the Savage dance

**...tequila!:** Omigah he gonna throw it back!

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m sorry, we’re avoiding that _ Vaggie  _ just said she’d rather murder  _ me _

**Lesbinin:** And I stand by it

**Charming Demon Belle:** I’m not gonna stand near you for another week

**Lesbinin:** wait no 

**Bambi Wannabe:** It’s atrocious.

**...tequila!:** the only part he did right was Throwing it Back which is the hardest move

**Bambi Wannabe:** It was like that time I saw a snake choke

**...tequila!:** Very bad, 0/10

**Lesbinin:** No one hated it more than me

**Lesbinin:** Out of all my mistakes, my biggest regret was watching that

**Floof:** I wish you were in a coma

**Bambi Wannabe:** …

**Bambi Wannabe:** Vaggie more like Veggie

**Charming Demon Belle:** I-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this was so late!! My mental health had dropped to an awful place, and I didn't even open my laptop because of how...awful it was. I hope you understand!


	8. I Guess This Is Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh Husk believes in ghosts

_ 3:28 A.M. _

**...tequila:** Do you ever get the feeling ur being watched??

**Lesbinin:** It’s literally three in the morning.

**Floof:** Bitch you’re awake too UwU

**Lesbinin:** Did you just call me bitch you candyfloss rag doll?

**Floof:** Ooh!! Creative! 10/10

**Bitch Detergent:** I always feel like I’m being watched.

**...tequila:** hmu when it happens 

**Bitch Detergent:** ....for why? 

**...tequila:** Well narcky, This got me thinking

**...tequila:** Perhaps its a ghost spying on me..

**Father:** uh.

**Father:** Husker, my whiskery pal, we live in hell

**Father:** Therefore, we would be the ghosts haunting the living back on earth if ghosts were in fact real

**Floof:** No no no

**Floof:** what some of us just weren’t good enough to have physical bodies!

**Lesbinin:** Oh! So some would be evil spirits!

**Bitch Detergent:** Oh! Oh! You should really stop! You’re fueling Husk’s weird paranormal side!!!

**...tequila:** I am the weird paranormal side, fuck you.

**...tequila!:** Goddamn I need some vodka

**Lesbinin:** You really shouldn’t be drinking!

**Lesbinin:** But also we gotta get buzzfeed unsolved over here

**Floof:** Those are living people

**Father:** Call I.M.P

**Lesbinin:** nO

**Charming Demon Belle:** whenever I think someones watching I physically cannot move

**Floof:** where fuck did you come from!

**Charming Demon Belle:** Sorry I was asleep at 3 AM.

**Floof:** You should be.

**Lesbinin:** I’m going to sTRAnGle you

**Floof:** Kinky ;)

**Father:** Disgusting. I would rather listen to dear old Husk’s ghost tales than to hear him speak

**Charming Demon Belle:** Alastor!! Why are you awake right now?

**Father;** Why are you awake at this moment Charlotte?

**Charming Demon Belle:** my phone buzzed so much it fell off my nightstand.

**Floof:** :0

**...tequila!:** stfu

**Floof:** Or what? You can’t do anything to me. Cuz ur a pussy UwU

**...tequila:** …

**Bitch Detergent:** Lady spider if I were you I would run. Run as far as I could.

**Charming Demon Belle:** please refrain from violence!!

**Father:** This is Boring. Charlie this was not what I signed up for

_ Charming Demon Belle has changed Father’s name to Bambi Wannabe  _

**Bambi Wannabe:** I could ruin you existence right now and broadcast to everyone you love your body being torn limb from limb and your screams that would fill the room.

**Lesbinin:** i will fite you

**Bambi Wannabe:** Okay.

**Floof:** Alastor. Can I ask an actual genuine question?

**Bambi Wannabe:** Of course my eight-legged friend!

**Floof:** Do people call you Aly?

**Lesbinin:** I-

**...tequila!:** Yep. People call him Aly constantly

**Bitch Detergent:** for a few years I didn’t know his name was Alastor hehe

**Bambi Wannabe:** They are not sincere. No one has ever called me Aly, nor shall.

**Charming Demon Belle:** That’s enough picking on Aly!

**Lesbinin:** wUT I-

**Floof:** Charlie!

**Charming Demon Belle:** Ik, what a Rebellious Demon Belle B)

**Bitch Detergent:** We stan a rebel Queen!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been great! Asta la vista!


End file.
